12/19/2023 0 Comments Photocopy moneyI did some research online, and came across talk of a paper feed clutch. Enabling users to sort out the easy issues has probably saved millions, if not billions, in service calls. The great thing is, over the last 20 years, copiers have started to include big, obvious pictorial instructions on both the LCD and the frame that help you troubleshoot a jam. I had to figure out why the paper was getting jammed - for your viewing enjoyment, I filmed the process and embedded it below. Notice the rippling from the paper bunching up in the various rollers. This test run behind me, I had an agonizing troubleshooting session ahead. Luckily, there were still a few beers in the fridge. In all seriousness, though, short of reinforcing the copier bed with a steel frame to enable the easier imaging of the human anatomy, I was running short on ideas and paper was jamming repeatedly. Instead, it’s necessary to support oneself by placing the hands on the corners of the copier, hovering above the platen, ideally with an assistant to help you by pressing the start button. The plastic frame tends to deform under this sort of load, just enough to stop the scanning bar moving across the platen. Even ignoring the risk of being crushed in the event of the copier falling over, the imaging bed isn’t designed as a seat. It’s not enough to simply sit down, placing one’s entire weight on the photocopier to image the buttocks. It took me a little while to master the proper technique. The Stuff You Can’t Do With the Work Copier Credit: Lewin Day At this point, though, I reached an impasse - what does one actually do with a free photocopier? Wait, of course! I promptly removed my pants. Their confusion and laughter was totally worth it. If you’re leaving the house would you PLEASE remember to turn the photocopier off before you go? Come on.” I quickly sent it to my housemates in a group chat. With the copier sitting by the fridge, I left it powered on and took a photo. I persevered, and found that if I quickly cycled the power, the copier would successfully boot. I remained hopeful, and then… beeps! The error code SC990 was given, as well as a local number to call for service - though that seemed like giving up, and they’d ask a few too many questions on turning up to a residential address. I was greeted with the phrase “Please wait…” for about ten minutes. Credit: Lewin Day Is This Thing On? Credit: Lewin Day Considering this was a piece of hardware I’d found on the side of the road, over the next forty minutes I began to realise I almost literally became the modern Sisyphus. It had become my task to push a 62 kg office multifunction 1.4 kilometers home (137 pounds and just less than a mile). The south-eastern suburbs of Melbourne are remarkably hilly. Calls to the few friends I’d made in my short time in Victoria came to nothing, so an alternative solution had to be found. I will not overstate the weight of this copier, approximately speaking, it was Damn Heavy™. A combination of its high rear floor and small cargo area (even with the rear seats removed) made loading the copier physically impossible. The 1991 Daihatsu Feroza is not, as it turns out, an appropriate transport for this task. Now I needed to get it home. This is where the problems began. It looked largely intact with no obvious major damage, and still had its plug attached. It had spent its days in a local primary school, and had survived fairly well. That day, I found mine: the Ricoh Aficio 2027 photocopier. It’s a great way to make any residential area temporarily look like a garbage dump, but there are often diamonds in the rough. It’s a time when local councils arrange a pickup service for anything large you don’t want anymore - think sofas, old computers, televisions, and the like. Driving home from a day’s work in the engineering office, I am greeted with a sight familiar to any suburban dwelling Australian - hard rubbish.
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